Ally-Ship - 5 things you can do to be a better Ally
Image by Reynan Oriega
The word Ally originates from the military world where countries who were banded together, usually by treaty, would fight against the others’s enemies. Not because they liked each other or had the same ideology but because they either stood in support of or against the same thing. You know, where even my enemy’s enemy is my friend and my friend’s enemy is my enemy.
This got be thinking about what a modern day treaty looks, sounds or feels like. What really binds us together? How does this cause us to treat toward one another? Is it the sense connection and kinship from family ties, friendship, nationality, race, cultural background, join beliefs and mutual understanding? Are those the treaties that we sign by default? - Women support Women, Black Support Black and so on.
The truth is that not everyone who belong to the same community are allies, not all family are friends and as it is sometimes said, “not all skin-folk are kin-folk”.
So, what exactly is the joint agreement that we sign that causes us to act for one another regardless of if we understand or agree on our ideologies, ethics, life choices, culture? - is it quite simply, Our Humanity? That we jointly stand against anything that challenges our collective deep belief in humanity because an attack on your humanity is an affront to mine?
There is more that binds us, than separates us and for this reason, We don’t have to be friends but where appropriate and necessary, We Must Be Allies. So here are;
5 things you can do to be a better Ally
Be open minded and actually listen: This is not the time to become combative, dismissive or selfish. It’s really not about you
Educate yourself: Whatever your care about, you learn about. Use various resources that are available - books, podcasts, movies and conversations to grow in your awareness of the issues faced by those in disadvantaged communities. By doing this, you can generate ideas about how you can help.
Confront your own prejudice even if it is uncomfortable to do so. We all have bias so acknowledging this is simply coming to terms with your humanity. The next step is then to challenge those preconceptions and change your behaviour.
Intentionally create spaces for courageous conversations and serve as a catalyst for inclusion across the various spaces you exist in
Believe that all people deserve to be treated with dignity and respect and be prepared to speak out against misrepresentation and offensive comments
The clear message to our world is that it is no longer enough to “not be” a racist, a homophobe, a chauvinist etc. We all have to be “anti” all of these things if you truly want to serve as an ally for individuals facing any form of prejudice in our society.
This post was written by Mary Mosope Adeyemi, Founder of viSHEbility